Snark is the great past time of our age, isn’t it? The Internet seems as though it was built for it. Snide remarks from the sidelines, brilliant volleys of wit across forum battlegrounds, virtual bitch slaps of sarcasm
Some forums have become showrooms for the snark master. Places where the true Snark Artiste go to demonstrate their skill and match wits one against the other. Many of these web sites are more entertaining than anything on television. I’ll admit, I watch. I’m a massive Regretsy fan. Those participants have definitely elevated snark to an art form…
But there’s a time and a place. Or should be, although it would seem few realize it.
Few would seem to have a care for the innocent bystander in these wars. Heaven(s) forbid that someone ask a serious question in a forum that’s supposed to be helpful…
A newbie asks a question. Something simple and innocent, betraying their status as the uninitiated. What offerings to give to a deity, when to give offerings, what their patron has told them, whether or not a book is good…
And the snark begins.
So many internet participants would rather dazzle their allies with their wit and intellectualism. They’d rather spew out their knowledge in bits of hostile repartee than be truly helpful.
It starts with just one snarky comment…and here comes the landslide. One after another, escalating as battles often do, the viciousness of comments becoming more and more severe.
No one even pays attention to the original comment after three or four posts. They’re too busy showing off. The thread dissolves into a pissing contest of wit, sarcasm, and snark.
Yeah, that’s real helpful, there.
The newbie is, predictably, changed for the experience. Either they will never show their face in that forum again, they will never show their face online again, or they become one of the initiated…snarking with all the other snarks in the ocean.
Even when there is no newbie present, there is snark. After all, these people are soooooo tired of newbies asking all these stupid questions!
Again, intellectual posturing. By making a statement like this, the poster is proclaiming to one and all how brilliant s/he is. After all, if they weren’t so bloody brilliant, newbies wouldn’t be bothering them, now would they?
“Look at all my trials and tribulations…” from Jesus Christ Superstar floats through my head every time I see someone write something like that.
It’s all about attention, isn’t it? The Internet…land of Attention Whores…and ego circle-jerks. It’s not just about the Manipulated and the Manipulators…no. Other people, who may be perfectly normal in every other way, go to the Internet for their daily ego fix. They raise theirs by bashing others into the ground.
Of course it’s that way in real life as well. I’ve often found that the old saying “misery loves company” is less about miserable people bonding together and more about miserable people trying to make people miserable…because that makes them feel good. Superior. The problem here is that it creates a chain reaction…one after another people will create misery which then explodes exponentially throughout communities.
Road rage, anyone?
On the other hand, people with generally kind, polite, sunny dispositions are often dismissed as being “dim.” Big mistake, that. Just because they don’t fall for the predatory snare of the average snark-baiter or misery-breeder doesn’t mean they’re stupid. Honestly.
They have simply found a far better use of their intellect.
If you get right down to it, I’d prefer to spend time with someone who is “dim” and nice than someone who is “smart” and cruel. Apparently, I’m in the minority there. I have found that in seeking out the kind, the nice, the polite…I have far more often found the intelligent and the wise than the opposite.
Don’t get me wrong. I’ve said I love a good argument and I mean it. But by that, I mean a “good” argument. A mutual back-and-forth with someone who is intellectually equal, but might stand on a different side of the fence from myself on any number of subjects, that doesn’t devolve into snark or insults. Arguing with people I respect…who respect me…is titillating, exiting, and exhilarating. Sometimes I even learn a thing or two from it. Those arguments also keep me intellectually limber, and give me a chance to evaluate my own beliefs.
After all…if you can’t defend your stand, do you really believe it? Sometimes I don’t realize I don’t believe something until I argue about it. Even if it is with myself…(as in my apology to the Godspouses!)
If I actually involve myself in a debate/argument with you, take it as high praise. Very high praise indeed. I find you worthy of stimulating dialog. This is a high compliment, and a mark of deep and profound respect…I think you’re smart and nice and I don’t think you’ll dive off the deep end into snark-infested waters. You have something to offer…and can challenge my own opinions on whatever subject I attempt to involve you in. Not everyone is able to discuss/debate/argue on that level.
Somehow, in this urge to be witty, there’s been a loss of being wise.
“Is this a hill you want to die for?”
When I have an inclination to argue, this is something I try to ask myself. Because sometimes the answer is “no.” The subject isn’t important enough to start a battle over.
“Would you rather be right or happy?”
If the person on the other side of the subject is going to be right in that glorious, self-obsessed sort of way (like many an Evangelist), then there is no point at all to the dialog. I am right…for me…and I have no need to get into a tedious, soul-wrenching, screaming, name-calling tantrum to attempt to convert them to my way of thinking. I would much rather be happy.
And furthermore…from the movie (and play) Harvey:
“Years ago, my mother used to say to me, she’d say ‘In this world, Elwood, you can be oh so so smart, or oh so pleasant.’ Well, for years I was smart… I recommend pleasant. You may quote me.” –Elwood P. Dowd
I need to say here…when I refer to forums, I don’t mean all of them. I have one particular forum in mind, yes. And many know which one I had in mind. I don’t want to say because although there are most certainly snarks in that water, not everyone who participates is actually a snark. I am *not* referring to the forum I have just joined recently, either…which has proven to be such a lovely, snark-free, attitude free respite from all the other forums I have ever found. I’m not going to post the name of that one, either. I like it just the way it is….yeah, I’m selfish like that. 
i love me some snark. I just got The Daria boxset. Its been a snarky dream in the house. That being said, I know exactly what you mean. We need more folks willing to lend a hand to true seekers and not instantly become dicks. Help a newbie and feel good folks. You were new once too.
-SS
Oh, yeah…don’t get me wrong. I love snark…in the right place and time it is *highly* entertaining!
I absolutely LOVE that you quoted Harvey in this post, just sayin’.
On the issue of snark, I myself am guilty of indulging in it once in a while (hasn’t everyone) but that is usually in the face of general common sense questions. I have also been known to snark after an well though out answer to a question has been answered with something incredibly inane/discourteous to me. The best example I had was (on a forum) someone had asked what they should do with offerings they’ve given Hestia after she is done with them, and since this person was basically living on the Ramen diet, how much would be a good amount of food offering to give her. In general practice, the intellectuals all said, you give her a hearty portion of your meal, then either bury it outside, or burn it. When the person expressed that they lived in an apartment building in the city and so those ways of ridding the offerings were unavailable, I responded. It went something like this: I’m wicked poor too, and can’t afford to waste a lot of food either. Say I am eating pasta, I give her about two noodles off my plate as an offering. That way the intent is there, but I’m not starving to death. I also live in an apartment and can’t just bury or burn my food (not that I would ever want too). I tend to have a plastic bag that is separate from the regular trash that I use to dispose of the offerings.
I was floored by not only the original poster’s remarks, but everyone else’s. It was like I had committed a great sin by admitting that I couldn’t afford to give Hestia half of my meal like a good little Recon would. And how DARE I live in an apartment where I couldn’t dispose of my offerings in “the proper way”. And the original poster had an attitude akin to “Who asked you anyway?” Well, egghead, YOU did.
I stay away from forums now. It’s just too murky a place to dwell.
Harvey ROCKS. And if anyone ever remakes that effin’ movie, I’ll be the first one to gather the posse headin’ off to Hollywood to fix the responsible parties’ buttons…if you get what I’m saying!
If you ask me, your situation there is a *great* example of good advice being snarked. Retaliatory snark was only human!
I’ve snarked myself. It’s an occasionally guilty pleasure. But there is most certainly a time and a place. Regretsy? Sure. That’s what it’s *there* for. A newbie forum? Dirty pool, if you ask me…
I’ve abandoned all but one forum. I give them a chance…see what their overall subculture is like…and generally they fail miserably. I don’t get it, but I’m not going to try to fight it on my own. Not a hill I’m willing to die on…
I’ll be your second in command on the storm to Hollywood. I’m still pissed they remade the movie “Charade”, renamed it as “The Truth About Charlie”, and put Mark “Marky Mark” Whalburg in the role CARY GRANT had played, and some relatively unknown french chick in AUDREY HEPBURN’S role. WTF Hollywood?
I *knew* I liked you! Harvey is one of my favorite philosophical movies. Also in the top ten…”You Can’t Take it with You,” (Another fantastic Jimmie Stewart role!) and “Joe vs The Volcano.” (Soooooo many people think this is just a chick flick…but it was written by a guy who wanted a visual metaphor for his own near-death experience and new found reverence for life…I LOVE THAT FILM…;) )
I refused to watch “The Truth about Charlie.” In fact, I have a boycott against 95% of remakes. There’s just no reason for them AT ALL. *fuming*
“Wickerman” and “The Day the Earth Stood Still” were abominations…I will never forgive Hollywood. EVER.
I stick mainly with the Classic films and BBC productions now. They seem to be relatively safe. Although I don’t know how many versions of the Jane Austens and Charles Dickens we really need…BBC seems to make all of those every 10-20 years or so!
So…if I hear of any remakes here…I’ll let you know and we can plan the posse…!
If they were remaking a horribly written B Movie from the 1930′s, updating it and making it better, I probably wouldn’t have a problem with it. The one film I’m hoping to high hell they don’t think to bring back (because it was so freaking good to begin with) is My Man Godfrey. You can actually take that film and apply it to modern times. The thing is, you don’t need to remake it.
Oh and as far as I am concerned, there is no Psycho remake. Anyone who claims there is one is obviously delusional and should be medicated. Tony Perkins (much to his chagrin) IS Norman Bates. He can tread that wonderful line between eccentrically endearing and creepy as all get out. To put anyone else in that role is sacrilege.
Snark without the vocal cues and miniscule body shifts of face to face communication is not really snark IMO. It’s just someone being cranky online. Snark is an art form.
YES
Snark *should* be an art form. And truly could be in it’s highest capacities. But online…no…just no.
All exchanges really do lose something without the visual and intonational aspect of the exchange. Internet “snark” is very one-dimensional…
Emoticons just don’t cover everything…;-)